Thursday, October 1, 2009

.: 家 :.

我的Blog又荒废了两个月十一天~

这次要写的是一件不愉快的事...

星期一,原本是平淡的一天,心情还蛮好的 因为很久不见的契妹终于肯约我出去吃晚餐了...
但是后来因为时间关系又超级塞车,结果还是见不到面...
不是这件事

当我出去载老婆的时候 二哥就打电话给我...

哥:你锁了房间门啊?
我:嗯 是啦
哥:你锁了我怎样进去restart modem 钥匙呢?
我:在我这里咯
哥:那我打烂你的门的啦!
我:你试下,看我打烂你的门没有
哥:你锁门做么?
我:我自己的房不能锁啊?
哥:哦,一家人你这样计算啦? (我心想:一家人又怎样 房间是我的哦!)
我:哇,什么这样算哦? 我的房来的哦!怕给人偷东西我嘛锁啦!
哥:谁得空偷你东西?
我:我觉得有人会偷我的东西我就锁啦? 不能啊?
哥:吊,还是这么幼稚!(盖电话)

(PS1: 我说的人就是他... 之前没问过我就擅自从我抽屉拿了我的external harddisk走没还给我... 我找了几天都找不到... 结果就在他的房间里找到)
(PS2:如果你们觉得我很自私很巴闭 问问你们 假设你们有个external harddisk放满了你们收集的戏三番四次借给同一个人后拿回来发觉harddisk开不到了 里面的戏全不见了 而且还弄到你们自己的电脑C Drive and D Drive都开不到要format 你们还会借给他么?)

回到家后 发现房门还真的是被人打破了一个洞 门后挂东西的架子也被打跌了
我会的粗口几乎在心里面骂了一顿 只差没骂出口
刚好爸爸上来看到了问我发生什么事 我叫他自己去问他的二儿子

我想: 好! 既然你都做到这样了 你做初一我做十五 你一天不修理好我的门你永远别想在家上网!BLOCK!!!

没多久妈妈也回来了 她问清楚什么事过后竟然 竟然还怪我为什么锁门 这么巴闭不借东西给人
我:这不是借!!! 不问自取就是偷!!! 还有你自己看门上的洞!!! 他二十六岁人还有没有脑的??!!
打下去之前有没有想过这间家不是我们自己的 是租回来的!!! 以后交回屋子给人的时候要怎样交代!!!
妈:你为什么不给他上网? 他要用的!
我:要用又怎样?用不到就在我门开个洞? 那我得不到的时候能不能打烂他的房门啊?!!! 还有他26岁了 做错
什么东西就要负责任!!! 不修理好就别想上网!!! 刚才在电话还讲我幼稚 现在是谁幼稚了!?
妈:你叫他怎样修理? 要换掉整个门啊 几百块一个门 他哪里有钱? 结果也不是要跟我们拿?
我:干我什么事? 自己做错事还要我帮她想办法解决? 叫他是男人就自己解决!
妈:你是不是要气死老豆找山拜!? 你自己跟爸爸讲
我:又关爸爸什么事? 我说这是他自己要负的责任 搬爸爸出来做什么 26岁还喊爹喊娘?
妈:不管你们了...

没多久我和老婆就出去跟朋友吃东西 照样锁门!
那家伙又打来 那是我驾车就不要接电话 打了几次我觉得很烦就叫老婆跟他讲我驾着车等下才打回给他
他叫我老婆开loud speaker 我无名火起破声就骂:妈的我说我驾着车等下打回给你听不到啊? 等下会死啊?
到了朋友家门口 我就打回给他
我:咩事?
他:做么我还是上不到网?
我:因为我block了你咯
他:为什么?
我:你自己做过什么事你自己心知肚明 你不修理好我的门你永远不用上网
他:你要做到这样啦?
我:是你逼我的
他:你是不是要气死老豆找山拜!
我:别搬爸爸出来! 是谁开始在我房门开个洞的!? 你自己做的事自己负责!
他:你跟我现在死回来!!!
我:懒得理你 我现在肚子饿要吃东西
他:吃你的X啊吃 吊你老母的X 回来!
我:尽管骂 你慢慢等 我吃了东西才回 (盖电话)

过了一会儿 妈妈又打回给我
妈:你现在回来不能么?
我:妈 我还没吃东西 你们让我安心吃一餐可以没有!?
这时妈妈的声音背后竟然传来那家伙一边讲话一边哭的声音!!?? (还在怀疑我有没有听错)
我:那家伙在哭?! 26岁哭??!! 有没有搞错?!!
妈妈没有反驳 以我对妈妈的认识 我知道没听错!!!!!!
妈:你自己跟你爸爸说!
我心想: 又叫爸爸来? 你叫他自己解决不能? 废材一个!

我爸爸问我为什么这样做
我:爸 你自己问你二儿子做过什么 你不要管这件事可以吗? 他26岁了! 让他为自己做过的事负责好么?
爸:你退一步海阔天空好么? 不要弄到家里吵吵闹闹的
我:现在是他打烂我的房门?! 我怎样退怎样忍? 当看不到没发生过? 他做错事不用负责?
爸:为什么你到现在还不觉悟? 你自己慢慢想吧...

我傻了 为什么现在好像是我错完似的?
在电话里的最后一句 我听得出爸的声音是很失望
想到爸有心脏病......... 算了
回到家就unblock他
我认输了...
那晚我吃的东西 是苦的...

我失望了 是对爸妈的失望
对 没错 我明白爸爸是要一家人大事化小 小事化无 和和气气
但这代表家人做错事就不用负责么?
做人要负责任! 这句话是你反反复复跟我讲 要我铭记在心里的!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

真的 我真的彻底失望了...

Sunday, July 19, 2009

.: 漂亮的一跤 :.

今天下午打篮球的时候,为了要挽救队友不小心丢到场外的一球,跌了漂亮的一跤...

最够力的是心口中的那一记 :(

请欣赏以下漫画...




PS: 我发觉我真的很没有艺术天份 ==!


这个好听!!!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

.: 神经错乱 :.

wahahahahahahahahhahahahaha kakakakakakakakakkakakakakaka
wehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehahahahahaha
WAKAKAKAKAKEHEHEHEHEHEHEHJOJOJOHOHOHOHOHOHO
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKA
OWH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WOHUAHUO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOWOWOWOWOWOWO !!!!!
MIAO ~~~~~~~~~~~~
MUUUU ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ARGF !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

.: 偷情的后果 :.

今天,妈妈忽然一把鼻涕一把眼泪地(笑出来的)叫我去看昨天的报纸...

有关于一则非常好笑的新闻...

如下:



所以说... 偷情也要选对地方... 要搞野就不要光天化日在露天停车场搞 XD

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

.: Blog Updated :.

看到每个人都有update他们的Blog... 就觉得是时候update一下下我自己的了...

有几件事想写一下下...

第一件 - PC Fair + Petrosains
2009年4月11日 星期六

那一天,我和老婆七早八早就爬起床出发去PC Fair...
老婆讲很久没吃点心了... 我就带她去Sri Petaling吃点心...
吃着的时候还犹豫着要驾车去KLCC还是要搭LRT去... 最后想到Parking很贵就决定搭LRT去了...
吃完了东西就叫老板结账... 老板算完后说:“二十八块” 心里就痛了一下下... 好贵 ~

结账后我和老婆“一大伙”就“浩浩荡荡”地出发去搭LRT...
到达KLCC的时候我们就很开心地向PC Fair的方向走去...
快走到Parking场的时候就看见那里的布条写着"Picom PC Fair blablabla 11am-9pm"
掏出电话一看时间 9am
我的天啊~ 原来PC Fair这么迟才开始~ 我还以为9点多就开始了呢~
现在回想起来就觉得好笑~

结果呢我和老婆就在KLCC里面到处逛啊逛... 逛到累了就到戏院楼下的Foodcourt坐下来休息...
等啊等终于到10.15am了... 我们就开始过去...
怎知去到那里的入口处... 只见人山人海... 全部人都在等Guard开门...
等啊等门终于开了... 却只是让Staff进... 又再等啊等 等等等等等等等~
终于可以进了... 时间 11.15am

我们逛啊逛 逛啊逛 逛逛逛逛逛逛逛...
逛到大约1点的时候岳母就打给我们叫我们过去Petrosains (约好了的)
我们就先过去.... 又要走回去 ~ 好远 = =
之前我父母都没带过我去Petrosains 这是我第一次去 还真的蛮好玩下~ (内容... 懒得打这么多字 XD)
令我印象最深刻的是一头会Rap的恐龙 =.=" 有点被炸到的感觉...

这一趟Petrosains居然花了接近4小时... 我只是吃了早餐那几碟点心... 肚子已经饿到~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
从Petrosains出来过后 我和老婆就立刻冲去Foodcourt吃东西....
看来看去都不懂要吃什么 都很贵 最后决定吃McDonald 快狠准~

吃了过后我们又走那段长长的路回去逛PC Fair... 没办法 因为还没买到要买的东西~
买了东西都6点多了 遇到在那里做工的朋友买了laptop要求我先帮他带回家 因为放工夜了搭车回家很危险 我很好人的~~ 就答应了他...
结果就拿着重重的laptop去搭LRT了~
回到家都8点多了
那天真的累到 ~~~~


第二件 - 萱萱做堂姐了~
忘了哪天晚上,妈妈忽然跟我们说:“萱萱要做姐姐了~”
我和老婆
听到一头雾水 老婆还在想是不是自己怀孕了 哈哈
妈妈说我二哥的女朋友怀孕了我们才恍然大悟~
哈哈 恭喜我二哥做老嚫了~
不过... 我给人叫爸爸已经够老了.. 还要给人叫叔叔... 唉~

第三件 - 结婚二周年纪念
2009年4月18日
这天是我和老婆的结婚二周年咯~~~~~
时间真的过得很快~
这天的12.45am 我就送了她梦寐以求的香水DKNY Be Delicious
傻傻的老婆开心到见牙不见眼~
由于我们有Jogoya买一送一的Voucher 所以我们决定去吃Jogoya庆祝
但是这次的Jogoya没这么好吃了... 失水准了~
我也懒得写为什么 要懂得就去看我老婆的Blog吧~
不过我们也吃到好开心~ 好饱~


老婆~ Happy 2nd Anniversary ~Muaks ~




最后送上我最近蛮喜欢的一首歌

T.I. ft. Justin timberlake - Dead and Gone





Justin:
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone

T.I. :
Every had one of them days wish you would have stayed home,
Run into a group of niggas who gettin their hate on,
You walk by - they get wrong,
You reply then shit get blown,
Way out of proportion way bad discussion,
Just you against them pick one then rush them,
Figure you get jumped here thats next,
They don't wanna stop there now they bustin,
Now you gushin ambulance rushin,
You to the hospital with a bad concusion,
Plus you hit four times but it hit yo spine,
Paralyzed waist down and ya wheelchair bound,
Never mind that now you lucky to be alive,
Just thinkin it all started fussin wit three guys,
Nigga pride in the way but your pride is the way you can f**k
around get shot down anyday,
Niggas die everyday,
All little bullshit, dope money, dice games, for their hood shit,
Could this be cuz of hip-hop music,
Or did the ones with the good sense not use it,
Usually niggas don't know what to do
when they back against the wall,
So they just start shootin,
For red or for blue or for blow I guess,
From Bankhead at the old projects,
No more stress now I'm straight,
Now I get it now I take
time to think before I make mistake just for myfamily stake,
That part of me left yesterday
The harder me is strong today,
No regrets I'm blessed to say the old me dead and gon away

Justin:
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone

T.I.
I ain't neva been scared I live through tragic,
Situations could been dead lookin back at it,
Most of that shit didn't even have to happen,
But you think about it when you out there trappin',
In the appartments hangin', smokin and rappin,
Niggas start shit next thing we know we cappin,
Get locked up then didn't even get mad,
Now I think about that what a life I had,
Most of that shit look back just laugh,
Some shit still look back get sad,
Thinkin my home boy still be around had I not hit the nigga in the mouth that time,
I won that fight I lost that war,
I could still see my nigga walkin out that door,
Who would of thought I'd never see Philant no more,
Got enough dead homies I don't want no more,
Cuz a nigga his jump cost me more,
I'd a took that ass whoppin out for sure,
Now think before I risk my life,
Take them chances to get my stripes,
A nigga put his hands on me alright,
Otherwise stand there talk shit all night,
Cuz I hit you and you sue me,
I shoot you get locked up poor me,
No more stress now I'm straight,
Now I get it now I take time to think
before I make mistake just for my family stake,
That part of me left yesterday
The harder me is strong today,
No regrets I'm blessed to say the old me dead and gon away
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,

Justin:
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone
I turn my head to the east
I see nobody by my side,
I turn my head to the west
still nobody in sight,
So I turn my head to the north
swallow that pill and think alright,
That old me dead and gone
what that mean I'm gon be alright,
I turn my head to the east
I see nobody by my side,
I turn my head to the west
still nobody in sight,
So I turn my head to the north
swallow that pill and think alright,
That old me dead and gone
what that mean I'm gon be alright,
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,
oooh,I've been travelin on this road too long,
Just tryin find my way back home,
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone



Wednesday, March 25, 2009

.: 新Laptop :.

很开心 因为很快的就买到了新的Laptop (Compaq Presario CQ40-401AX - RM2049)
很感谢我的家人
我以后会小心点的了

又有一点点的失望 因为买不到我想要的 (太贵了 >.<) 不过算了 有新的就已经足够了 唉 大家要小心抢匪啊~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Whatever You Like - T.I.



Hey Jill
You know the old sugga daddy

I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
Yeah

[Chorus:]
Stacks on deck
Patron' on ice
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like (you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
Yeah
Late night sex so wet you're so tight
I'll gas up the jet for you tonight
Baby you can go where ever you like (you like)
I said you can go where ever you like (you like)
Yeah

[Verse 1:]
Anytime you want to pick up the telephone
You know it ain't nothin to drop a couple stacks on you
Wanted you could get it my dear
Five million dollar home, drop Bentley's I swear
Yeah I want'cho body, I need yo body
Long as you got me you won't need nobody
if you want it I got it, go get it I buy it
Tell 'em other broke niggas be quiet

[Chorus:]
Stacks on deck
Patron' on ice
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like (you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
Yeah
Late night sex so wet you're so tight
I'll gas up the jet for you tonight
Baby you can go where ever you like (you like)
I said you can go where ever you like (you like)
Yeah

[Verse 2:]
Shawty you da hottest love the way you drop it
Brain so good swore you went to college
Hundred cant deposit, vacations hit the tropics
Cause everybody know it ain't trickin if ya got it
and you ain't never ever gotta go in yo wallet
Long as I got rubberband banks in my pocket
Five six, rides with rims and a body kit
Ya ain't gotta downgrade you can get what I get
My chick can have what she want
And go in any store for any bag she want
And know she ain't never had a man like that
To buy you anything ya heart desire like that
Yeah I want'cho body, I need yo body
Long as you got me you won't need nobody
You want it I got it, go get it I buy it
Tell 'em other broke niggas be quiet

[Chorus:]
Stacks on deck
Patron' on ice
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like (you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
Yeah
Late night sex so wet you're so tight
I'll gas up the jet for you tonight
Baby you can go where ever you like (you like)
I said you can go where ever you like (you like)
Yeah

[Verse 3:]
I'm talkin' big boy rides
And big boy ice
Let me put this big boy in yo life
The thang get so wet, it hit so right
Let me put this big boy in yo life
That's right
Yeah I want'cho body, I need yo body
Long as you got me you won't need nobody
You want it I got it, go get it I buy it
Tell 'em other broke niggas be quiet

[Chorus:]
Stacks on deck
Patron' on ice
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like (you like)
I said you can have whatever you like (you like)
Yeah
Late night sex so wet you're so tight
I'll gas up the jet for you tonight
Baby you can go where ever you like (you like)
I said you can go where ever you like (you like)
Yeah

Hey Jill

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

.: 倒霉 :.

倒霉的我 今天原本要到学院区找些FYP的资料
倒霉的我 去学院之前肚子饿 所以在附近的Petronas油站吃麦当劳
倒霉的我 吃完之后拿着手提电脑往车子的方向走去
倒霉的我 就在和车子的距离只有几步路的时候 手提电脑和我的手忽然被一股强劲的力道分开
倒霉的我 回过神来的时候 就只见两条黑黑的粉肠拿着我的手提电脑坐在摩多车上迅速地迈向那宽阔的Sungai Besi Highway
倒霉的我 可以做什么?

听歌咯....



David Archuleta - A Little Not Too Over You




It never crossed my mind at all
That's what I tell myself
What we had has come and gone
You're better off with someone else
It's for the best
I know it is
But I see you

Sometimes I try to hide
What I feel inside
And I turn around
You're with him now
I just can't figure it out

Tell me why
You're so hard to forget
Don't remind me
I'm not over it
Tell me why
I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you

Memories supposed to fade
What's wrong with my heart
Shake it off let it go
Didn't think it would be this hard
Should be strong, moving on
But I see you

Sometimes I try to hide
What I feel inside
And I turn around
You're with him now
I just can't figure it out

Tell me why
You're so hard to forget
Don't remind me
I'm not over it
Tell me why
I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you

Maybe I regret
Everything I said
No way to take it all back
Yeah
Now I'm on my own
How I let you go
I'll never understand
I'll never understand
Yeah, ohhh.

Tell me why
You're so hard to forget
Don't remind me
I'm not over it
Tell me why
I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you

Tell me why
You're so hard to forget
Don't remind me
I'm not over it
Tell me why
I can't seem to face the truth
And I really don't know what to do
I'm just a little too not over you

Not over you, ooh.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

.: UPSR Malay Essay from a 12 years old kid :.

最近很懒的写blog,又不想别人觉得我懒,所以就贴些搞笑的东西跟大家分享下~ 哈哈


Title : 'Kemalangan paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat

Pagi itu pagi minggu. Cuaca cukup sejuk sehingga mencapai takat suhu beku. Sebab itu saya tidak mandi pagi sebab air kolah jadi air batu dan air paip tidak mahu keluar sebab beku di dalam batang paip. Pagi itu saya bersarapan dengan keluarga di dalam unggun api kerana tidak tahan sejuk. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya menemaninya ke pasar. Tetapi saya tidak mahu.

Selepas emak menikam perut saya berkali-kali dengan garfu barulah saya bersetuju untuk mengikutnya. Kami berjalan sejauh 120 kilometer kerana pasar itu letaknya 128 kilometer dari rumah. Lagi 8 kilometer nak sampai pasar saya ternampak sebuah lori kontena meluru dengan laju dari arah belakang.

Dia melanggar emak saya. Emak saya tercampak ke dalam gaung. Dia menjerit “Adoi!”. Lepas itu emak saya naik semula dan mengejar lori tersebut. Saya pun turut berlari di belakang emak saya kerana takut emak saya melanggar lori itu pula. Pemandu lori itu nampak kami mengejarnya. Dia pun memecut lebih laju iaitu sama dengan kelajuan cahaya. Kami pula terpaksa mengejar dengan lebih laju iaitu sama dengan dua kali ganda kelajuan cahaya. Emak saya dapat menerajang tayar depan lori itu. Lori itu terbabas dan melanggar pembahagi jalan lalu bertembung dengan sebuah feri. Feri itu terbelah dua.

Penumpang feri itu yang seramai 100 orang semuanya mati. Pemandu feri itu sangat marah. Dia pun bertukar menjadi Ultraman dan memfire pemandu lori. Pemandu lori menekan butang khas di dalam lori dia..lori itu bertukar menjadi robot Transformer. Mereka bergaduh di udara. Emak saya tidak puas hati. Dia! pun terus menyewa sebuah helikopter di Genting Highlands dan terus ke tempat kemalangan. Dia melanggar pemandu feri yang telah bertukar menjadi Ultraman itu.

Pemandu feri itu terkejut dan terus bertukar menjadi pemandu feri semula lalu terhempas ke jalanraya. Pemandu feri itu pecah. Pemandu lori sangat takut melihat kejadian itu. Dia meminta maaf dari emak saya. Dia menghulurkan tangan ingin bersalam. Tetapi emak saya masih marah. Dia menyendengkan helikopternya dan mengerat tangan pemandu lori itu dengan kipas helikopter. Pemandu lori itu menjerit “Adoi..!” dan jatuh ke bumi. Emak say menghantar helikopter itu ke Genting Highlands. Bila dia balik ke tempat kejadian, dia terus memukul pemandu lori itu dengan beg tangannya sambil memarahi pemandu lori itu di dalam bahasa Inggeris.

Pemandu lori itu tidak dapat menjawab sebab emak saya cakap orang putih. Lalu pemandu lori itu mati. Tidak lama kemudian kereta polis pun sampai. Dia membuat lapuran ke ibu pejabatnya tentang kemalangan ngeri itu. Semua anggota polis di pejabat polis itu terperanjat lalu mati. Orang ramai mengerumuni tempat kejadian kerana ingin mengetahui apa yang telah terjadi. Polis yang bertugas cuba menyuraikan orang ramai lalu dia menjerit menggunakan pembesar suara. Orang ramai terperanjat dan semuanya mati.

Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya ke pasar untuk mengelak lebih ramai lagi yang akan mati. Di pasar, emak saya menceritakan kejadian itu kepada penjual daging. Penjual daging dan peniaga-peniaga berhampiran yang mendengar cerita itu semuanya terkejut dan mati. Saya dan emak saya terus berlari balik ke rumah. Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

.: Who will work in this kind of company :.

To all Employees:

Effective January 2007


Dress Code

1. It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a pay raise.

2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.

3. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a pay raise.


Sick Days

We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as proof of sickness.

If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.


Holiday Days

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.


Compassionate Leave

This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements.

In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.


Toilet Use

1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the cubicles.

2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle door will open, and your picture will be taken.

3. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company notice board under the "Chronic Offenders" category.

4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.


Lunch Break

1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy.

2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.


Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive employment experience.

Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.


Management

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

.: All the women are same :. (转帖)

字有点小, 如果你们看不到,单击图片就能放大了,有四张...




Saturday, February 21, 2009

.: 骂得好 :.

没什么东西想讲

只是想跟大家分享下香港某某电台的DJ骂一个堕落女孩的一段录音

骂人的DJ声音和Style都很像张卫健



还有这首歌

韩国电影“美女的烦恼”主题曲 - Maria

歌词自己去找 = = !我看不明...




Sunday, February 15, 2009

.: 13th :. .: 14th :.

2009年2月13日

这天,是我和老婆的拍拖4周年纪念

这天,24小时里去了一次LCCT,一次KLIA,送走了三位朋友

送达成和家文的时候还好,送陈俊文的时候...

不懂从几时开始,好像是到他家吃饭地时候,心里就有种说不出的感觉

当他要上机的时候 眼浅地老婆终于哭出来了 还有维生 和俊文离别前的拥抱时也忍不住哭了

心里多么地不舍 但是我还是忍住不流泪...

陈俊文, 自从这欠扁的家伙离开过后,我和老婆感觉好像缺少了什么似的

当我们两个闷的发慌时,习惯性地想:“我们去找俊文喝茶咯~!”

刚说完就想起:“啊,他出国了...” 然后心里就酸酸地...

老婆还梦到我们和维生一起去australia找他呢

不,正确来说是老婆和维生一起去找他,说起来也蛮搞笑地

梦境如下:

某天,维生约她一起去australia找俊文 她就说我不得空要做功课

维生说:“不用理康伦,我们自己去!我请你!机票买了!” (死维生 !!!)

她就很高兴:“好啊~ 走吧~” (什么老婆来的...)

然后他们就飞去找俊文了...

当他们到australia找到俊文时非常吃惊,因为看到我跟俊文在一起... (哈哈,炸到)

老婆就问我为什么会有钱买机票的?

我就说:“我卖了你的电话来买机票咯~”

*结束*

哈哈,搞笑吧?

不过... 还真的希望我们能到australia找他... 当然还有找家文和达成

希望他们能顺利完成他们的学业,最重要当然身体健康~


2009年2月14日

这天,是我和老婆的第五个情人节

可怜的我们不能晚上出去庆祝,因为妈妈要去出席舅舅的生日晚会

所以我们就下午出去Mid Valley咯~

经过百般挑选,我们决定吃Chilis~

吃完东西过后我们就到处逛逛,原本想看戏但是要排很长的队,所以就作罢了~

差不多整间MV都逛完了... 我们都想不到有什么东西做所以就回家了

好普通的情人节哦... 不过令我想起了一句歌词

“只要爱对了人,情人节每天都过~”

啊~ 差点忘了! 想给大家看看

我送给老婆的情人节礼物




老婆送我的情人节礼物



好了,到此为止... 是时候专心做我的 FYP Research 了


年年有今日 - 古巨基 Featuring Beatbox 金牌一条顺(ink, 侧田, 方力申, 小肥, 六号, 古巨基)




我未忘在小店 与你吃炸酱面 这生日太经典
凭朱二绳使芳心甜 自此开始发展
若是钱袋不变 也要与你逐年 共渡难忘经验
如经我手的更鲜甜 愿跟海鲜血战
每份礼物筹划过 全配合你星座
明年唯求能突破 只清唱半段情歌
那日会如何渡过 而你亦鸣谢我
盼望发白仍是我 想该天与你怎过
今天陪你再大一岁 仍纯得似清水
如我爱你是金句 要讲到你睡去
一生陪你每大一岁 仍洞识你心水
不忍你 流半滴泪 为了理想新居 再卖力亦无拘

日夜勤力争气 每到这个日期 都想给你惊喜
如卡地亚表能报喜 储蓄得有道理
礼物纵未迎合你 仍赞颂我品味
送上我从前日记 竟使你快乐无比
接受我未成大器 仍当十全十美
对合照来描划你 真迹比钻戒优美
今天陪你再大一岁 仍纯得似清水
如我爱你是金句 要讲到你睡去
一生陪你每大一岁 仍洞识你心水
不忍你 流半滴泪 能有你这爱侣 我自问被抬举
(陪你再大一岁 纯得似清水)
不需首饰的生日里
使我知 在乎谁

Friday, February 6, 2009

那天

那天,因为前一晚打球打到太累了 所以早上起不到来 miss了一堂课

那天,第二节课还是迟到的我匆忙地赶去上课 上到一半忽然发现钱包不在身边 以为不见了 原来留在车

那天,为了不要让朋友久等 冒着被lecturer责问的危险提早半小时假假听电话溜出去偷偷回家准备

那天,走了一段很恐怖 很危险的路去一间海鲜餐馆帮朋友庆祝生日 东西并没有非常非常好吃 离开时因为太黑退车时没看到有沟渠 后胎就这样卡着了 幸好有朋友帮忙推车

那天,我第三次去club 也是我答应自己的最后一次

那天,我才懂原来喝酒的多寡全看心情的好坏 我第三杯就晕了

那天,我真的很累

那天,终于说出口了
那天,我才懂我就是罪魁祸首

Nickelback - Gotta Be Somebody



This time, I wonder what it feels like
To find the one in this life, the one we all dream of
But dreams just aren't enough
So I'll be waiting for the real thing, I'll know it by the feeling
The moment when we're meeting, will play out like a scene
Straight off the silver screen
So I'll be holding my breath, right up 'til the end
Until that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with

Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me like that
Cause nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there

Tonight, out on the street, out in the moonlight
And dammit this feels too right, it's just like déja vu
Me standing here with you
So I'll be holding my breath, could this be the end?
Is it that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with

Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me like that
Cause nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there

You can't give up, (when you're looking for) a diamond in the rough (cause you never know)
When it shows up, (make sure you're holding on)
Cause it could be the one, the one you're waiting on
Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me, oh

Nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there
Nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there